Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Nisrin!

She's tiny and white.
She's quiet and discrete.
She wakes up when i sleep
and sleeps as the sun goes up.
She seems innocent and sweet.

But is she?!

Under that soft, quiet, innocent looking exterior lies an angry beast waiting to come out. It lurkers around waiting for the right moment to attack!
Hiding behind her American sense of personal distance and her occasional half-hugs and rare cheek kisses, lies the real Nisrin.

The real Nisrin comes out every............

Scrabble Night!

Passive aggressive is not her style. Why be passive when you could be actively aggressive?

Exhibit A:
Kent Babin - in an excerpt from his blog post he says:
"The second round featured new teams, new attitudes, and an increasingly hostile Nisrin. She threatened physical and verbal violence on no fewer than twenty occasions."

Exhibit B:
Annika Rudback - Here are quotes from last night's game:
Nisrin: "If you can't beat 'em, Kill 'em"
Annika: "It's if you can't beat 'em, join 'em"
Nisrin: "Not for me it is"
5 minutes later
Nisrin: "Come on Annika, if you don't go right now i will jam that pencil in your eye-ball"

Exhibit C:
Chris Pflaumer - This is a well-deserved comment that Chris gets from Nisrin every 5 minutes:
Nisrin: " CHRIS, YALLA" and then bangs her hand on the table so her rings make a loud squeaky noise

Last but not least...

Exhibit D:
ME!
Me: " what the fuck niso, stop making noise with your feet, it's either your feet or your hands yaani"
Nisrin: "Sorry, i ...."
Me: "am a smoker?"
Nisrin: "No, I have ADD"
Me: " And by ADD you mean..."
Nisrin: " Annoy the hell out of luli? Yes"

I rest my case!

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Liscence Renewal - First time is definetly NOT a charm

I woke up in the morning with a smile on my face. It was mainly due to my latest shopping conquest the night before. Charles and Keith has 60% sale so i got the most gorgeous stilettos.
Now if you're a girl with a big shoe fetish you will understand the kind of high i was on.

I was mentally and physically prepared for a long day renewing my licence for the first time. Armed with a lot of positive attitude, my outfit was carefully planned. Comfortable shoes that look a little like Sister Erica's from my school days, Jeans - i expected dirt, a carefully selected top that is to be worn by an 80 year old woman with a cleavage going all the way to my neck (quite a contrast to my look the night before), and long enough that it would work as a mini dress for an anorexic size zero model, and on top a flowy shirt, with long sleeves. My futile attempts at getting as little attention as possible was very smart of me. Good girl luli!

So the first part is to get my tickets and pay for them. Much like every other desk at that place, desk number one had no line for women, scratch that, it has no line - period. So i must squish between a big concentration of taxi drivers. The thought makes me tingly in all the right places! HMM! From Desk number one, i go to desk number 2, 3,4,5 back to 2, then to 3 again then to 6 then to 7 and then i am done! Mind you Desk 2 and 4 are on the ground floor, desk 3 and 5 are on the top floor and desk 6 and 7 are in a different building.

I got my glorious tickets which were 500 L.E. It was so fascinating i took a photo

The tickets say i have the following fines:
21st of February: Talking on the phone and crossing a red light - it took place in the East district in Alex
On the 21st of Feb i was at the office preparing for my flight in a few days. I was no where near Alex. Plus, we're in Egypt you need to have a traffic light to begin with in order for cross a red one!
11th of April: Halting traffic and parking in a no parking spot - it took place in the East district in Alex
On the 11th of April i was at the office. I had a flight 2 days after. So i could not have been in Alex
27th of April: Ok that time i was in Alex, so i guess it could be valid. It's a fine for going in the opposite direction
17th of June: Parking ticket - it took place in the East District in Alex
On the 17th of June i was at the office with meetings booked and all. I was not in Alex

I argued with the officer there and he reduced it to 50 L.E.
Alas i paid and off i went to start renewing my licence - coz this was 1/4 of the job!

So off to a new building. I go from Desk 1 to Desk 2 back to desk 1 then to desk 3 then back to desk 1. Desk 1 is a nice man with a beard (i didn't know there were any of those around) He told me go to desk 4 give your papers and they'll give you your licence. I slipped him a tenner and happily thought i was almost done. Little did i know that this was only the beginning.

Desk 4 was full of men, men and more men. No line of course. My positive attitude failed to serve me as i struggled to get in the crowd. That's then mommy came to the rescue. After 90 minutes at this desk they gave me a piece of paper. That paper needs to go to the computer department so they can issue the licence. So off i go to the next floor.
After 60 minutes the offices calls my name and my father's name which is music to my ears. my licence is done! ( In Egypt you have 4 names, yours, you fathers, your grandfathers and a family name)
As i am going i check it out, and it says: Jaylan Abd El Salam Mraasi Zaki. Sadly it's not my name. The number on the licence is also not mine. A 3 has been switched with a 2.
I guess it's expected when all of the writing is done by hand, and very fast.

I go back to desk 4 and employees are leaving. After 30 minutes and some 5 attempts i find a guy who gets my folder and fixes the mistake. I slipped him a few pounds of course.

So off i go to get my licence again at the computer room, when they reply to me with brilliant news (insert sarcasm) "The electricity is out".
Another 45 minutes of waiting and the officer calls my name gives my the lisence with the right number, right name and after 5 and a half of grueling hard work.

I should have felt victorious since i managed to get my licence in a day - which is not always a possibility.

Somehow Victory was not the feeling that prevailed.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

the day after the night before

So i am completely engrossed in Mcdeamy's and Meredith's plans in the elevator and i decide to multi-task and arrange my bag.
I take out my train ticket and tear it to pieces. Once i do that, i jump up and let out a big scream which puts my dad on his feet asking "WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?"
Turns out the ticket i just tore was not the ticket i had just used. It was the ticket i just bought to use tomorrow.
So i was left with this:


Some time after that, and a bit of scotch tape and this is what i ended up with:

Now i just hope the train conductor is nice enough to accept this and does not charge me another time.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Summer is over and winter is almost heeeere!

I never thought i would be that excited coz summer is over - but i totally am!
Summers in alex meant beaches, swimsuits, lovely tans, half naked boys, AIESEC fun, traveling, time off from studying - a constant PARTEEY!
Over the years i enjoyed a lovely month in England which was amazing, a month in Turkey that was just one big party day after day (oh what i'd pay to do that again!), an adventurous trip to Korea with Shady - pretending we were married so he would bargain for me, checking out hot US marines walking the streets and awwing at corny asian boy bands and doing loadz of stupid stupid things, and germany - the trip of death!
I have also enjoyed the summer nights, the partying till dawn, the nights at poo's, the sneaking around my mother at 3 am - those were the days!

But now as i have so obviously and sadly grown up into a career ahem "woman" and moved to the big C summer is just a blub of sweat waiting to hit you at the next corner. Time off in the summer is not in sync with your friends, and it's short, it's hot and stinky and there are all those fun things around you just can't to because of that thing called J O B!

Winter is, however, GREAT!
All the kids go home early -> less traffic!
No more sweating -> finally contacts, make-up and hair is possible!
Great breezy weather -> dressing up is fun again!
No more A/C -> now people can actually listen to my singing in the car - lol!

So i am feeling ACTIVE! and this winter is going to be the winter of A C T I V I T Y!
no more meeting in people's houses and all that crap!
So here's what's gona happen:
- Day trips to Mansoura, Fayum and Rashid
- More feluccas than ever
- More walking around old cairo and attending street concerts
- Enough with the coffee shops - it's time for CLUBS!
- and activities need to involve some "activeness" i.e. bowling, airhockey, walks, mid-night horse backriding by pyramids and stuff like that
- dancing - needs to happen more often!

Let the winter BEGIN!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

4th time's a charm!

Last weekend i went to siwa, and i have about 18 bite marks to prove it!
The trip was great!
Some serious sandboarding, driving on sand dunes and swimming in hot and cold springs was exactly was i needed.
All my intchiness and bites are a sweet reminder of the two nights spent watching the stars and hearing about Luke's college and frat days and Annika's travels accross the globe!

Now, it's back to reality :(