Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Nisrin!
She's quiet and discrete.
She wakes up when i sleep
and sleeps as the sun goes up.
She seems innocent and sweet.
But is she?!
Under that soft, quiet, innocent looking exterior lies an angry beast waiting to come out. It lurkers around waiting for the right moment to attack!
Hiding behind her American sense of personal distance and her occasional half-hugs and rare cheek kisses, lies the real Nisrin.
The real Nisrin comes out every............
Scrabble Night!
Passive aggressive is not her style. Why be passive when you could be actively aggressive?
Exhibit A:
Kent Babin - in an excerpt from his blog post he says:
"The second round featured new teams, new attitudes, and an increasingly hostile Nisrin. She threatened physical and verbal violence on no fewer than twenty occasions."
Exhibit B:
Annika Rudback - Here are quotes from last night's game:
Nisrin: "If you can't beat 'em, Kill 'em"
Annika: "It's if you can't beat 'em, join 'em"
Nisrin: "Not for me it is"
5 minutes later
Nisrin: "Come on Annika, if you don't go right now i will jam that pencil in your eye-ball"
Exhibit C:
Chris Pflaumer - This is a well-deserved comment that Chris gets from Nisrin every 5 minutes:
Nisrin: " CHRIS, YALLA" and then bangs her hand on the table so her rings make a loud squeaky noise
Last but not least...
Exhibit D:
ME!
Me: " what the fuck niso, stop making noise with your feet, it's either your feet or your hands yaani"
Nisrin: "Sorry, i ...."
Me: "am a smoker?"
Nisrin: "No, I have ADD"
Me: " And by ADD you mean..."
Nisrin: " Annoy the hell out of luli? Yes"
I rest my case!
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Liscence Renewal - First time is definetly NOT a charm
Now if you're a girl with a big shoe fetish you will understand the kind of high i was on.
I was mentally and physically prepared for a long day renewing my licence for the first time. Armed with a lot of positive attitude, my outfit was carefully planned. Comfortable shoes that look a little like Sister Erica's from my school days, Jeans - i expected dirt, a carefully selected top that is to be worn by an 80 year old woman with a cleavage going all the way to my neck (quite a contrast to my look the night before), and long enough that it would work as a mini dress for an anorexic size zero model, and on top a flowy shirt, with long sleeves. My futile attempts at getting as little attention as possible was very smart of me. Good girl luli!
So the first part is to get my tickets and pay for them. Much like every other desk at that place, desk number one had no line for women, scratch that, it has no line - period. So i must squish between a big concentration of taxi drivers. The thought makes me tingly in all the right places! HMM! From Desk number one, i go to desk number 2, 3,4,5 back to 2, then to 3 again then to 6 then to 7 and then i am done! Mind you Desk 2 and 4 are on the ground floor, desk 3 and 5 are on the top floor and desk 6 and 7 are in a different building.
I got my glorious tickets which were 500 L.E. It was so fascinating i took a photo
The tickets say i have the following fines:
21st of February: Talking on the phone and crossing a red light - it took place in the East district in Alex
On the 21st of Feb i was at the office preparing for my flight in a few days. I was no where near Alex. Plus, we're in Egypt you need to have a traffic light to begin with in order for cross a red one!
11th of April: Halting traffic and parking in a no parking spot - it took place in the East district in Alex
On the 11th of April i was at the office. I had a flight 2 days after. So i could not have been in Alex
27th of April: Ok that time i was in Alex, so i guess it could be valid. It's a fine for going in the opposite direction
17th of June: Parking ticket - it took place in the East District in Alex
On the 17th of June i was at the office with meetings booked and all. I was not in Alex
I argued with the officer there and he reduced it to 50 L.E.
Alas i paid and off i went to start renewing my licence - coz this was 1/4 of the job!
So off to a new building. I go from Desk 1 to Desk 2 back to desk 1 then to desk 3 then back to desk 1. Desk 1 is a nice man with a beard (i didn't know there were any of those around) He told me go to desk 4 give your papers and they'll give you your licence. I slipped him a tenner and happily thought i was almost done. Little did i know that this was only the beginning.
Desk 4 was full of men, men and more men. No line of course. My positive attitude failed to serve me as i struggled to get in the crowd. That's then mommy came to the rescue. After 90 minutes at this desk they gave me a piece of paper. That paper needs to go to the computer department so they can issue the licence. So off i go to the next floor.
After 60 minutes the offices calls my name and my father's name which is music to my ears. my licence is done! ( In Egypt you have 4 names, yours, you fathers, your grandfathers and a family name)
As i am going i check it out, and it says: Jaylan Abd El Salam Mraasi Zaki. Sadly it's not my name. The number on the licence is also not mine. A 3 has been switched with a 2.
I guess it's expected when all of the writing is done by hand, and very fast.
I go back to desk 4 and employees are leaving. After 30 minutes and some 5 attempts i find a guy who gets my folder and fixes the mistake. I slipped him a few pounds of course.
So off i go to get my licence again at the computer room, when they reply to me with brilliant news (insert sarcasm) "The electricity is out".
Another 45 minutes of waiting and the officer calls my name gives my the lisence with the right number, right name and after 5 and a half of grueling hard work.
I should have felt victorious since i managed to get my licence in a day - which is not always a possibility.
Somehow Victory was not the feeling that prevailed.
Saturday, October 20, 2007
the day after the night before
Some time after that, and a bit of scotch tape and this is what i ended up with:
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Summer is over and winter is almost heeeere!
Summers in alex meant beaches, swimsuits, lovely tans, half naked boys, AIESEC fun, traveling, time off from studying - a constant PARTEEY!
Over the years i enjoyed a lovely month in England which was amazing, a month in Turkey that was just one big party day after day (oh what i'd pay to do that again!), an adventurous trip to Korea with Shady - pretending we were married so he would bargain for me, checking out hot US marines walking the streets and awwing at corny asian boy bands and doing loadz of stupid stupid things, and germany - the trip of death!
I have also enjoyed the summer nights, the partying till dawn, the nights at poo's, the sneaking around my mother at 3 am - those were the days!
But now as i have so obviously and sadly grown up into a career ahem "woman" and moved to the big C summer is just a blub of sweat waiting to hit you at the next corner. Time off in the summer is not in sync with your friends, and it's short, it's hot and stinky and there are all those fun things around you just can't to because of that thing called J O B!
Winter is, however, GREAT!
All the kids go home early -> less traffic!
No more sweating -> finally contacts, make-up and hair is possible!
Great breezy weather -> dressing up is fun again!
No more A/C -> now people can actually listen to my singing in the car - lol!
So i am feeling ACTIVE! and this winter is going to be the winter of A C T I V I T Y!
no more meeting in people's houses and all that crap!
So here's what's gona happen:
- Day trips to Mansoura, Fayum and Rashid
- More feluccas than ever
- More walking around old cairo and attending street concerts
- Enough with the coffee shops - it's time for CLUBS!
- and activities need to involve some "activeness" i.e. bowling, airhockey, walks, mid-night horse backriding by pyramids and stuff like that
- dancing - needs to happen more often!
Let the winter BEGIN!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
4th time's a charm!
The trip was great!
Some serious sandboarding, driving on sand dunes and swimming in hot and cold springs was exactly was i needed.
All my intchiness and bites are a sweet reminder of the two nights spent watching the stars and hearing about Luke's college and frat days and Annika's travels accross the globe!
Now, it's back to reality :(
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Premier Week - well it's about freaking time!
abc looks like it's ready to kick some ass!
i can't wait to snuggle in bed with some ice cream over the season's premiere of Gray's anatomy - i have already watched the promos like a zillion times!
i can't wait to gossip about gabi's discovery in her wedding and what the other DH crew has been up to.
sadly we have to wait a few more months till Lost is out but it's ok i'll be busy with all those new shows. They are also exciting! private practice with the gorgeous red head and quite a few promising other options.
must get that anonymous browsing going so i can enjoy all the shows starting NEXT WEEK
YAY!
sorry for the dorky post but i LOVE TV!
Monday, September 03, 2007
the world of spices
After about a week of putting soy sauce and chicken onto the stove i decided it was time to change. This was partly because i was embarrassed by Kent - he was coming to visit and if he'd seen my soy-chicken fiasco he would not give me a break. I chopped some tomatoes with it and Kent was happy, and so was I!
The next time i was waiting for the meat to cook i looked around and saw Nisrin's glorious collection of spices. I lined them up and smelled each and everyone of them. And trust me - with my un-recovered nose, that was hard. Initially i was inclined to put a bit of everything from sweet basil to Cinnamon on top and see what happens. Then i wised up and picked my two winners: Sweet Basil and Allspice. The third one was garlic powder, but again i imagined Kent's mortified eyes if i used garlic powder when i had fresh garlic right there in the kitchen. So i chopped off some garlic and put it all in there.
The result - GREAT! i have been eating this mix for 2 weeks now. I am going to get bored from it in a few days and decide to put new winners,, i am thinking curry and something else i don't know yet.
So i am finally giving up my "the only spice i eat is salt" attitude, and i am now a spice believer.
bring on the spices!!
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Rant
Today my bawab (door man) decided to interfere with my daily rituals that set me off to a good or okay day.
He volunteered to tell me that the guy from the phone company that came to fix my phone (2 weeks late by the way) was pissed that i did not give him any money. So my bawab gave him money. So i told him not to go around giving money on my behalf or for me, it's his JOB to fix phones and i pay his company enough. His justification was that if we don't tip him then the next time a phone stops working in the building he will not come straight away and will stall for a couple of days before coming to fix it.
This is just classic! if the bawab expects me to give him his money back then he is WRONG! if he has too much money and wants to be charitable, he can do so on his own budget not on mine. And if he can do that then we are obviously paying him too much, that an electrician working for the phone company is getting charity from a bawab!
As for that idiot phone guy - if he wanted a better job, he should have studied well in high school and got into a good FREE university and make more instead of playing in the streets, smoking up and watching porn and end up in some technical institute that would make him blue collar for the rest of his life. I shouldn't pay for his poor choices. And i know the bullshit about him not making enough money and life is expensive and he has to feed his family - but he should have thought of that when he smoked his J instead of going to class!
I hate that everyone expects a tip to do THEIR FREAKING JOB!
I really hope Nasser is burning in the depth of hell right now with whips and hot flaming stones being constantly thrown at that fragile useless communist body of his, and when i meet him there i will give him a nice big kick in the crotch...
I am having a bad Egypt day!
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Bye bye wisdom
So i successfully dodged a visit to the dentist - YAY!
I am slowly regaining my sense of smell,, well really slowly
and now it's time to pack my bags and go back to the big C to get on with the rest of my life.
So i have made a list of things that should make me happy to be going back to reality:
1) i get to use my favorite toothbrush again - i have missed my blue oral B :)
2) work wanted to avoid me being back with a frown and decided to give our paycheck a little nudge so YAY!
3) no more freezing in A/C - courtesy of (mom's) menopause
4) scrabble time
5) starting to shed off the vacation weight and a hopefully a little more
ok i am out, that's it...
it's full on vacation blues till next weekend :(
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Never again!
never gonna happen, no liposuction, no c-section....nothing - general anesthesia is my enemy!
I have mastered sign language because speaking is not an option at the moment. And not being able to talk is torture for one outspoken talkative gal like me.
Saturday, August 11, 2007
no pwesents this time
I made it up to alex and spend most of my days being a beach bum. Kent finally made it out here and i am expecting him to name me the one and only Alex Champion :D
My vacation time ends tonight - tomorrow i go in to do some small procedure and will probably spend the rest of my vacation high on pain killers
if you are up for a laugh, come keep me entertained
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
ok i am bored!
i've organized my drawers, done my finances, arranged the book shelf, cleaned a bit, organized my room, done all the handwashing, done like 6 loads of laundry, fixed the wardrobe, watched like 10 episodes of scrubs, gave myself a pedicure and showered like 5 times
and I AM BOOOOOOORED! it's too friggin' hot to stay without A/C and too fucking crowded to venture out in the horrible cairo streets. UGH!
i know alex won't be much better but at least i know where i can find a treadmill that won't cost an arm and a leg.
my last scrabble night with kent is tomorrow - i am still hoping something would happen and he'd end up staying in egypt for a little longer. scrabble night won't be the same without his trash talk and good food.....
i can't remember the last time i felt like this bout someone leaving,,,,,, luli sad :(
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Reflections of a chair
Saturday, June 30, 2007
2 hours of pure and utter bliss...
Thursday, June 28, 2007
the cook, the winner, the smart one, the clumsy one and the STAR!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Mr. Peace envoy to the middle east!
Yesterday the front page of CNN was filled by none other than Paris Hilton coming out of prison, no no not the other news around the world - no - paris comes out of prison, hard core news!
Today BBC has the most entertaining "Have your say" about Tony Blair - Bliar as some like to call him - being the new peace envoy to the middle east.
For once i am speechless - i will let the masses on have your say speak for me..
I especially want to point out this comment which had me laugh out loud in the middle of the quiet office.
"very amusing! what next. Salman Rushdie to be appointed UK's High Commissioner in Pakistan? George Bush to be offered a Chair in Philosophy at Oxford? Prince Charles to become King of England?"
haward, düsseldorf
Seriously - who needs comedy channels and E!
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
School was in session!
A strong new comer has emerged: Annika, the first guest at Casa de lulinis.
Kent was schooled! Schooled like never before! Even nisrin beat him. Not a good day for "the babin"
He however was the King of the kitchen - he made my i-want-to-live-till-i-am-a-hundred-diet seem so easy with his italian chicken and peppers and risotto-like rice.
My mom could very well have a shrine and temple dedicated to kent for making me finally eat peppers.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Bring it on Babin
So we've decided to turn our Scrabble challenge into a league instead of a tournament.
So after i beat him the first time (and i didn't gloat at all!) yesterday it was his turn. Although 1 points and 6 points difference is small it still counts - so i humbly accept the loss of a battle but not the whole war :D
Well i guess kent nailed the night, 2 games of scrabble won, awesome french toast for desert and a colorful apron with a beautiful bow at the back!
Guys, feel free to envy him ;)
Saturday, June 09, 2007
6 flights - 10 days
Sandra, as an encouragement decided to let me take charge of the whole weekend
After a good hike in acceptable european weather, beautiful ice cream and loadz of pics we decided to take a boat trip around all the canals.... that was almost perfect! if it werent for 5 loud abnoxious italian guys sitting at the back being.... italian!Then i FINALLY made it to an amusement park! YAY - roller coasters and swinging from 63 meters above the earth.
I was scared! but i am glad i did it... i did miss the pantomime show - it would have been awesome to see one for real :(
We also saw some sharks,, and my friend thought i was crazy as i sang baby shark all the time
I had been inspired by Jen in this video:
I got home on thursday at 3:30 and had to be ready in party mode in 4 hours. Clean house, shower, look pretty, oder drinks and snacks and make sure surpize welcome back party for nirsin goes as planned.
It was a blast, partly due to the fact that is was FULL of nomadlifers!
superluli, nisrin, dodyg,kent,tom,christhebrit, brodie, arthur, farzina, mustafa, purveya el hindeya, askoura, maidaoud, meyouka, martha, nora,kaitlin.
There were also a bunch of other almost equally as cool as the nomadlifers,,, almost!
Thanks you guys, you were PERFECT!